"You Do You Boo!"
Weddings are full of traditions and that's completely ok and very important for some people but I am giving you full permission to break some of these traditions if you want to........let me show you how!!!
I would encourage you to do what excites you both....if you want to walk each other down the aisle - fantastic!! If you don't want to do the bouquet toss - well you don't have to!!
Dont worry what other people think, follow your own path make your wedding a true reflection of you and your love story.
If it feels wrong for you, skip it!
Ok so here goes.....
Some Traditions You May Feel You Want To Change!...
~ Getting Ready in Separate Places
Why not share the excitement together, help each other to get ready have some fun and relax the nerves with the person you love most in the world!
More and more couples are opting for a first look photo session too before the ceremony and photographers also love this
~ A White Dress
You can go with any colour dress you want to, floral boho, gothic black, bright red - the worlds your
oyster go with what you love and what reflects your personality the best!
~ Matching Bridesmaid Dresses
This can be quite a challenge as we are all different shapes and sizes, why not mix and match and let the bridesmaids choose what's comfortable for them - you just need to specify long or short or mid length and preferred colour palette and let them go from there!
~ Something Old, Something New, Something Borrowed, Something Blue
Its even hard to say all this and if you don't want to tick all these things off, you don't have to - its ok! If you want to do just one of these then thats great, like maybe including a family heirloom in your wedding somewhere.
~ Alternative Ways To Walk Down The Aisle
There is certainly not one way to do this!!!
Why not both parents walk you down the aisle,
Or you can go it alone,
You can both walk down the aisle together,
You can also meet each other in the middle
Step father and biological father both walk you down the aisle
Another family member to walk you down the aisle
Whichever way you choose is the right choice for you.
~ Families Sitting On Opposite Sides At The Ceremony
This can feel a bit awkward and may look a bit imbalanced if one of you has a huge family and your partner has a small family - go for the 'choose a seat, not a side' saying and mix it up by encouraging your guests to sit where they like and with whomever they like.
~ Readings
No need to be formal about this at all - do a lucky dip to see who gets to do a ready, pick your fave speech from a movie, one of you does a reading perhaps. Or alternatively, of course, you don't have to have a reading at all
~ Bride/Groom To Be Given Away By Parents
If you feel a bit uncomfortable with the term 'giving away' thats ok its quite an antiquated tradition there are other ways to honour your parents throughout the ceremony by perhaps writing a thank you which can be read out by your celebrant, or there may be no need for words there can be family hugs and shaking of hands. Or the celebrant can ask the guests 'Do you all support these two awesome humans?' and they can answer in a huge cheer and a big YES!
~ Mixed Gender Wedding Parties
Well this is a definite ok and you don't have to have equal numbers either, mix it up a bit and feel free to have as many or as few as you like. If brides have a guy friends and grooms have a girl friends have them in your bridal party - if they are important to you, include them!!
It is also worth remembering that you can have no bridal party at all.
~ The Vows
If its all too daunting for you - pick a funny story to share each and give people a glimpse into what makes you both an awesome couple
~ The Timeline You dont have to follow a traditional timeline at all - concentrate on what will flow for you on the day and your guests experience, whatever you decide to do is the right thing for your day - remember your day, your way.
~ The Long List Of Must Have Photos
If you don't like the idea of formal, prescribed shots for your wedding let your photographer have free rein you will get the most awesome candid shots which you will treasure forever and will be a true reflection of your day!
~ Grooms Speech
If the groom is particularly nervous about this then why don't you both do a speech or perhaps do the speeches before your start the reception so you can get on and enjoy the celebrations. You could even ask a family member to speak on your behalf if its all just too much for you - its ok!
~ First Dance
If the thought of dancing whilst everyone is watching is a bit anxiety provoking why don't you invite everyone to join you on the dance floor, you can always skip the first danced completely if you want to!
~ Bouquet Toss
Your bouquet has taken a great deal of love and thought to make and if the thought of chucking it across a dance floor fills you with dread don't do it!! Keep it safe in a vase to treasure! You can have a separate throw bouquet if you would still like to do a bouquet toss - just ask your florist to make one for you.
If you dont want to embarass your single friends you dont have to have a bouquet toss at all!
~ Garter Strip & Toss
If you are a shyer bride and the thought of this fills you with dread - give this a miss - its not one of the most meaningful of traditions anyway!
~ The Wedding Night - Consummating the Wedding
Many couples do not quite make it to this point on the wedding night ha ha ha yes I'm serious, organising and delivering a wedding is exhausting and by the end of the night you guys may just want to fall asleep still in your clothes!!! If you just want to order a pizza and reminisce about the day - go for it! If you want to have a bath with some candles and go to bed thats fab too. Or if you want to make it a full night of passion - go for it!!!!!!!
If you think of any other 'tradition breaking' ideas just let me know!!!
Clare xx